The conflict room.

Within the home of our heart are many rooms, castles, mansions, places that we can reach by contemplation, prayer, or other kinds of meditation. Or just by listening to the sights and sounds of life that surrounds us.  

Here on Pastor’s Porch, we are discussing this notion as the home in our hearts. We are moving through this home and exploring these different rooms within our soul.  

Our journey began in the base of this home where knowledge resides within our own innate wisdom and the wisdom of our faith elders. The base of our spiritual home is our faith that sustains us. Faith that can be deepened through exploration, much more than certainty. 

Our next room within the home in our hearts is the room of conflict.

In this room we bring the wisdom of the elders, our faith, our own innate wisdom, and our most pressing conflict.

This conflict may be a personal matter or conflict that we see happening in our family, community, or world that may be weighing on our spirit.

I know that for a long time I was conflict averse. I didn’t like being in conflict with anyone. I could feel my heart rate rise and my anxiety spike as I anticipated stepping into any conflict. I also remember that if conflict arose, I was ready to react with anger and I had no problem arguing with someone. It took me a long time to be able to react to conflict with an attitude of curiosity, grace, my own innate self-worth, and a spirit of resolution finding.

This does not mean that I’m now attracted to conflict or some sort of master of conflict, free of my own triggers of self or other loathing. It means that within my spirit is an ability, when I’m in a healthy space, to remain fully present and available to the movement of the Spirit in most times of conflict that arise in me, my surroundings, or my work as the pastor of a church. Again, it is a continuous journey of learning and stretching.

This is where the room of conflict can help us. In this room we bring, not only the Spirit of the still speaking God with us, but we also bring the wisdom of the other rooms to bear on the conflict we are wrestling with. We bring lament, relaxation, our spirit of listening, our own faith, and the faith of our ancestors into this room within our heart.

What we learn in this room is that conflict doesn’t have to be an anger filled argument. In this room, we bring our fully human selves to bear on the conflict and we learn all that there is to learn about life: Even conflict can provide some wisdom and teaching.

This room teaches by holding the conflict with us. In this room God listens to our wrestling heart. When we allow the room to do its job, we can learn that there is wisdom to be gained during times of conflict.

In this room we ask God to sit with us. We approach God with our vulnerability so that we may realize that the Spirit of the still speaking God is also an ever-listening presence in our lives.

In this room we are allowed the space and freedom to leave the conflict, even if only for a few moments, and find ourselves.

We are reminded in our soul.

Much like the water holds the lily

God holds all, cares for all.

God beckons us.

Come!

Let Me sit with you.

Let us enjoy a moment of sharing.

Leaving any conflict.

To find caring.

We are here to remind the soul.

You are life.

Wisdom your teacher.